REST IN PEACE

Well Done, its DONE!

My Dearest PHAMLI,

Today is a good day! I have a new kind of peace that surpasses all understanding, truly. I am preparing the new piece for the week and wanted to send some love to the PHAMLI. I'll be back soon and I would like to thank all of those who sent prayers and kind and encouraging words to me, after the loss of my God Mother... THANK YOU!

I'm a firm believer that, what you sow you will reap, and in its proper season,"When you sow Love you will Reap Love!"  If there is one thing that I could leave you with, it would be that if you have someone in your life that you need to make peace with, DO SO. Don't carry the hurt, pain and baggage around in your heart, because it will affect you in more ways than 1. FORGIVE AND LIVE! I will share the story of why this particular home going has forever changed the course of my life for THE BEST! I pray that each and every one of you are taking life and LIVING IT as full AND AS OFTEN AS YOU CAN. Love yourself, Be Kind to Others, Speak Words that Build Up and not Tear Down and DO NOT WASTE TIME ON ANYTHING. Remember, that what's meant to be will be, and what is not will fall away by the death of its own weight! Until next time!

Be Well

Belazadu'm
Yahminah McIntosh

...an excerpt from the short story

Rest In Peace

...I looked into my left mirror, to see if I could get over

but the stretch was a little different, this time
neck is getting stiffer, I guess because I've gotten older
Anita Baker was singing her heart out, an apology I could feel
and then that phone got to ringing, and when I looked at the ID,
I couldn't believe it was real
Calling Me?? No not Calling ME!
Hello, Hello dear 1 they said, do you have a moment to spare
and I was so choked up, eating a PRIDE candy bar
and couldn't speak, but they had something they needed to share
"Pull Over", they said, and I was like, how did they know I was driving
and they said remember, you always thought that I had eyes in the back of my head
and we need to talk, because its our time
and they began to talk, their voice as strong as I could remember
it kind of soothed me, but at the same time made my Autumn feel like JUNE'S WINTER
They said sorry for not leading by example, because I was where you are
and sorry for not loving you enough to dust your wings off, so that you could go far
I'm sorry for making you believe that your dreams were too heavy for you to carry
and I'm sorry for telling you to build the ark of other's dreams, and lay to rest your visionary
and I'm so proud of you and where you are
what you've accomplished and done, dear heart
and I'm here and I'm willing if you'll accept me back into your life
and at first my mind said, NO, but how could I
when I made a similar confession when accepting Christ
They said its been almost two years that they wasted
but thought of me daily, but reality they couldn't take it
I was parked in the shade where there was no possibility of sun
and all of a sudden, my car was filled with the light that my pain had hidden
my eyes full of tears, and my words broken, and muffled and cracking
those words that I dreamt of hearing one day while in the land of the living
is what I heard, those words...those meaningful, valuable words...
I couldn't do anything but embrace their sincere words
and I listened as their voice changed, and became weak
and 3 hours later we were still laughing and talking
Oh my smile, my smile was bigger than the widest valley
and my heart was dancing to hallelujah praise tunes!
I was excited and told them all about the new projects that I had going on
and SHE SAID, I Know, I've been following your life all along...
So I was ready to start making plans again, like old times
because on Tuesdays and Fridays we made sure we enjoyed our time
So I took out my appointment book
and flipped a couple weeks in advance
and I asked her what date would be good, and she said
that she didn't know how long she would have...
I said, excuse me, I don't understand, what do you mean
she said, I've made peace with Allah, and my heart is NOW CLEAN
As I began to speak, SHE shushed me
and asked me to hold, and while doing so, I heard strange beeping
beep, beep, beep, beep
someone in the back ground said, get some rest and I'll be back in a sec

and she came back to the phone and asked if I could come to right then?
I'm sick...Sick? No you're not sick, you don't get sick
Remember you created the beat the devil down with the faith stick, right, member???
Nujoi, which is what she called me, I don't have much time so please hear me
I was diagnosed with cervical cancer 3 weeks ago and its too late
so they're making me comfy
I've tied up every loose end, and you were the last that I couldn't leave
and I would be honored in this living moment
if you could come and sing with me...sit with me...hold my hand and bring me peace
Well, I said I love you, but I'm about to catch a flight
have prior commitments on the other side of the world tonight
and she said she understood, because I was a woman of my word
and I asked her to hold out, and she gave me hers...
Away and couldn't speak
had fire all around me, and I was hurt see, couldn't express
what I just left, because where I was in that moment, could have destroyed me
but thank God for my mind being at peace
As soon as I arrived home
I dashed to her side, palms sweaty because upon entering her home

family and friends were there with teary eyes

my heart... was so heavy and filled with hope

and they said she moved into the hospice home two hours ago

I don't even remember, how I made it across town

but what I do remember is the word that she kept

and her amazing face, and the spoken words that I found

and when I walked into the door, she was sitting up in the bed

As fierce as always, smelling good and dressed in white with a bald head

she stretched her arms out to me

and asked the nurses to help her stand

and she said this here, is the last moment

in my life

that I will stand at a command

but I must for this friend

I almost fainted from the JOY of the EMBRACE

The tears, in the eyes of us and everyone around

anointed that place

We talked for hours, like Celie and Nettie playing in Mistah's front yard

and we laughed and I fed her and she ate as much as she could

We spilled our guts, and God gave wisdom to us

the hurt that I had been through was washed with the

resolution of her fate

She was given 5 days but we carried on in paradise for 3 weeks

The last time I saw her, we sang, "He's Sweet I know", and because

of the sores in her mouth our words, turned into humming

We held hands, we exchanged laughter and smiles

and we exchanged prophetic whispers

and I gave her the note to give to God

and she said I'll make sure he gets it before breakfast

Our prayer, was peace and our reunion was ordained

because with every, BROKEN PIECE OF ME

THERE WAS A HEALING THAT I COULD NOT EXPLAIN

AND AN UNDERSTANDING OF ALL THAT WAS HAPPENING

AND WHY IT HAD TO GO THIS WAY

GOD USED THE LAST MOMENTS OF HER LIFE

TO EXTRACT THOSE THINGS THAT BLOCKED MY BLESSINGS

I left at 11:43 PM

and went home and began playing "Just a closer walk with thee"

and I laid down and my heart began to beat fast

and as I began calling the hospital

they were calling me,

and all of a sudden, I heard "Till We Meet Again"

and the nurse said, "IT IS WELL"

If I only knew what angels really sounded like when they sang,

that is what I believe I heard on the other end of that phone

...I prepared for my trip and for my performance

and by God's Grace was able to perform in one piece

I was able to make it back home in time enough

to see her off to Glory

My Friend, My SistAH and My God Mother, May You Rest In Peace

I appreciate What you Allowed God to do through you FOR ME

I Love You, Indeed...

Yahminah McIntosh Copyright 2009-2011

In Memory of my IdaMez Munira-Johnson

JazakAllah Khair